deceiving

Loneliness is a very tricky little bugger... It really has nothing to do with how many people are around you or the quality of those people. All it really has to do with is you. That is part of why it is so deceiving. I've been thinking about this a lot lately and watching people and how they respond to this phenomenon and it always seems to amazes me. Typically I see two reactions: Retreat or Attack. Either people (myself included) pull further away from life and people when they are feeling this way or they seem to lunge out; becoming controlling of people and circumstances trying to stage everything just right and keep people as close as possible and yet in the end they are just as lonely and people like them less. Neither reaction is a healthy one and neither seems to get rid of that lonely feeling...and I really have tried both of these options from every angle I can think of. Most often I don't think we are even aware of why we are lonely. When ever this feeling creeps into our life so unsuspecting as it does we either just accept it as 'another lonely day' (as Ben Harper would call it) or we chalk it up to whatever circumstance or situation we can think of. Loosing a job, breaking up, a fight with a spouse, kids, too tired, last night's pizza, not enough friends...anything we can think of that explains it, even if only for a moment seems like a little relief but we are still stuck with the feeling for however long it sticks around. Or are we? I am not one to believe in hopelessness. Its probably the logical side of me that says there has to be a reason and there has to be a solution, I just have not found it yet. I am getting closer though. I do think that part of loneliness is situational. But when it is something that keeps coming back like a boom-a-rang we should look a little deeper. The situation, though it may be real, is only showing me something that is already there I just wasn't seeing at the moment. So then, my next step is to deal with the part that's already there. The only way I know to do that is through God. Nothing else I've tried has worked so I might as well try going through Him on this one. If you don't believe in God, or just don't like Him right now...I'm not sure what the answer is for you. If you find another way that doesn't just get rid of it for a week or so but actually gets you through it let me know. If not I'd say try another option.